For my challenge this week I decided not to announce it beforehand. Partly because it was something I had to do alone, therefore no one could attend anyways and partly because I was wanting to back out and find a different challenge. The challenge was going to a movie alone. I was basically dreading it. But, after chatting with one of my favorite clients today, somewhere in the conversation she said something that really made a lot of sense. “Being uncomfortable is kind of the point of getting out of your comfort zone.” So I sucked it up and went.
I got into my car around 9:30. Complimented myself in the driver-side mirror, “You’re darker hair color really looks great on you.” “Why, thanks for noticing!” And I was on my way. I knew this was going to be a great date already. 😉
I arrived at the theaters to a full house. Took me a minute to find a parking spot. I walked up all alone and asked the clerk for one ticket to ‘Gone Girl.’ I paid, then headed towards the snacks. I was on the verge of laughing at this point. I felt pretty uncomfortable, not going to lie. But the chuckle to myself was a positive one too. Like, ‘Wow I really can’t believe I am doing this, pat on the back for me.’ I wasn’t really feeling the popcorn tonight, so I opted for another classic; Buncha Crunch. With snacks in-hand, I handed the clerk my ticket and headed towards theater 7. It was still completely light in there, the previews hadn’t started yet. I found myself a spot about 3/4 back. The only people I noticed that were possibly wondering what I was doing, was an older couple in front of me. They looked back a few times and gave me a smile.
It wasn’t long before the movie started. By this point, I was totally fine and enjoying myself. Watched the whole movie through with no distractions. Just for myself. It was nice. I really think I could go for doing this again. And to think I was so nervous and dreading it just a few short hours ago!
What I realized with this challenge is I can be really self-absorbed. It’s hard to admit but here I was sooooo worried that people were going to look at me weird, judge me. That they’d think I got stood up or feel sorry for me. The truth is no one cared one bit. I often tend to care TOO much about what other people think of me. When in reality, they probably aren’t really thinking about me at all. It’s easy to get caught up in that. Truth is, if I ran into someone I knew that was alone at the theater, I’d probably be a lil jealous that they were that confident and comfortable with themselves to go alone.
In this journey so far I have learned that while this is a self-discovery of finding out who I am, the one thing I know for sure is who’s I am. And He is the only one I really need to be concerned about with what He is thinking.